The Tao of child rearing…and a lesson in uncluttering laundry.


I’m getting ready for company this weekend.  I’m thrilled, it’s been a while.  Since moving to this little house, not many people visit.  I’m packed into a neighborhood, a little yard, not much room or privacy, and the house is small.  It’s not exactly a vacation hot spot.  But now all the sudden the calendar is filling up and we are having a guest this month and next month and the next!

Having guest is a great motivator for deep cleaning.  I have spent all day going through my boy’s clothes.  We have been SO lucky and given so many hand me downs in great condition that I haven’t had to buy anything, not even underwear, in a couple years and after today it looks like another couple years.  I’m also putting a huge bag on the street (my personal thrift store and way of recycling).

I avoided this task and the room looked like a laundromat gone wild.  Now I had to deal with it since the kid’s room is also the guest room.  The best way to do this task is take everything off shelves and drawers and pile on the floor.  Sift and divide.  Clothes that will fit later (those go in a storage bin), clothes for now (put away obviously), and thrift store (or curb depending on where you live).

I was reading this woman, Crystal Paine, today.  Her book caught my eye, I forgot what the title was now and I’m too lazy to try and find it.  However, she blogs and writes and tells women how to budget and blog and make money and all the things everyone and their grandmas are doing out there.  She talks about having 3 children and blogging 40 hour weeks and being on blogging committees…what the hell?  Anyway, she over scheduled and lost it.  The end of the story is about her returning to her family, simplicity, and so on.

I don’t know how you make money off blogging.  I would love to just make enough off my books to buy a new washer.  The thought of blogging 40 hours?  What do you blog for 8 hours a day?  How do you schedule that?  I have had to look at creating a schedule for work and play, but my blogs take minutes.  It’s the book writing that is a sucker of time and energy.  Blogging is just having fun conversations with invisible people over coffee or ice tea.  Why do people have children and then try and have full on intense careers and run a home?  Who are they competing with?  As Tony says (that’s Tony Robbins to those of you who don’t know that I have him in my information Rolodex at all times), “It’ll take 10 years of that shit to really grind her into the ground.”  He was talking about a young girl trying to people please.

I’m 46 this month and every day I get closer to 50 I give less and less of a toot.  I stay home because it’s fun!  I have children because I’ve wanted them since I was 5 years old.  I blog because it’s fun, I write books because it’s fun (sure ain’t making the bucks yet).  Why do anything unless it’s fun, compassionate, good for others, environmentally friendly…and fun once again!

This one was hard for me.  I was raised to sweat and toil, bleed and suffer.  I have to be reminded every single day…”Relax lady, relax!  We aren’t on a mission, no one here is in the Olympics training for anything…chill out!”

People love to talk about the Tao of this, the Zen of that, the Buddhist way…well that is fun, humor, being present.  Ah, I miss smoking pot sometimes.  That really is a great way to become present.  You feel like a little cell in a bubble expanding in a minute of time…bliss.

House cleaning is fun, cooking is definitely a creative outlet.  Child rearing is fun,  they have fun toys and watch fun shows.  I love the shows and Disney movies.  Sometimes my children are the fun toys themselves.  As one friend put it when we visited and were playing in the pool, “You brought such great toys!” Meaning the kids.  How can anyone stay serious with kids?  I laugh everyday.  Sure, I want to give them a whack sometimes for not listening to me.  Sure I sound like a shrew out in the back yard when I’m pissed off at the fact they can’t just play peacefully while I get things done.  But then I laugh too.  Their crazy, these kids.  They have their own agenda, they act like they’ve been drinking half the time.  The drama they can stir up over a toy…or a log (like today).  Drama over a f–king log we dragged home from the park.  Such displays of human nature in the rawest form.

I’m really writing this blog for myself.  I got a little irritated today when I found my boys playing horse wrangler with my bras.  One is so stretched out I had to relinquish it to being used to lasso.  The other I saved in time.  It’s a good thing I don’t spend much on bras yet.

So, let go, surrender the bras, the schedules…throw the log away…


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