My good friend from Oregon came for a visit this weekend. We had so much fun! We ate, cooked, shopped (for food of course), laughed heartily, played with the boys, they made us laugh even more, more cooking, more eating…you get the idea. Pure fun and lazy.
This trip was different from her last. I have put so much time and care into creating my little home and yard to be pleasing, comfortable, even feng shui. I have also been doing all this inner work and I can best see my progress when another actor enters the stage. Then you really see if you’ve grown.
I will admit that I have a bit more work to do as I discovered the day we did some recording for my videos on HowTube. HowTube is very new and I don’t even know if it’s released, but I am lucky enough to be the close friend of the sister of the man who created this project. I get a free spot and this is a one time offer. The stakes were high. Did I mention I detest myself on film these days? So, I had to work through my self-esteem issues and physical appearance issues (which I don’t have as long as I don’t have to be on film or have photos) and put together a nice little video about my books. I hadn’t written anything out or practiced…procrastination works for me, it’s the rush of pressure and limited time that gets my best work at times.
My friend had to entertain the boys while I sat alone in the house recording because I didn’t want anyone around. It took moving about the house quite a few times until I found the perfect natural lighting in the morning and it took a few takes, but I did it! Then we tried to edit and had to download a program. That didn’t work and my PayPal wouldn’t work even with funds in my account. Then we sent it to her computer but she couldn’t work with it and I can’t explain because there were a lot of big, techie, computerie words. But I know that it took hours for nothing and my friend was getting fried. The boys were being…boys and the little one wanted to nurse every five minutes. I was trying to clean and get the house in shape, make videos, be alone to write out a script and Sammy wasn’t having it. My children and their demands don’t bother me until I’m actually trying to get something accomplished outside the norm of cleaning, cooking and shopping.
Then we decided that we would record on her laptop. I didn’t like the camera view and wanted the lens switched around, then the lighting was lost in the living room in front of my fabulous painting that I had rehung for the big event. She had to find a new program for the princess (me) and then I only found the best lighting in the kitchen.
So what started out in the morning with me bright and perky, lip gloss perfect, great painting in the background, fabulous videos….and ended in the kitchen with clutter on top of the refrigerator as part of the scenery, great lighting, though, and me a little slow and with bloodshot eyes. Yay! Then I had to do several takes, one of them I had started to record when my friend’s little dog discovered the cat and I had to deal with that ruckus behind me. I thought I had turned off the camera, but I recorded the whole fiasco. There were other takes that ended with me cursing. I was just not as perky as that morning after a couple cups of coffee. I am not an afternoon person.
In the end, we did it! I don’t know how I really feel about the videos, but we are out of time and it is what it is. We had some good laughs watching the outtakes (as they call it in Hollywood) we even thought of putting them at the end for fun. I think that only we would find them funny because we were so over it.
As fun as this trip was, I felt like we had so much resistance with the recording of my commercials and the other thing we had issues with were fun movies. We wanted to laugh and I even put out my intentions to find fun movies. Instead, we found a movie about women in the early 1900’s fighting for the right to vote, Suffragette, which was a great movie, but so hard to watch, so much struggle and pain. We did watch it, but then we turned to Prophecy for our entertainment. It was such a bad movie we decided it was perfect for doing our own version of “Mystery Theater 2000”. For those of you who have never seen this, it was a late night show with this man and a few robot puppet characters. They would watch those really bad, bad, old movies. You know, the 70’s movies that shouldn’t have even had dialogue because it only confirmed how bad the movie was. The robots and man would have these hilarious running dialogues for the movies.
We watched 3 Prophecies. We couldn’t hang in for the 4th. I expressed to my friend that I felt like we had really worked hard for our laughs that evening. We had to work hard for the commercials, the laughs.
This sort of applies to my life right now. IT’s fun and easy, but I’m trying to create some things in my families life and I feel blocked. I feel like things are waiting to come forth, but I’m keeping it all at arms length with my beliefs, my thoughts. I do believe I have guides, unseen spirit guides that try to help, but we have to get quiet. This can be the spirit guides that are connected to source or God speaking to us, the holy spirit…whatever you want, just fill in the blank.
My friend told me a story of one of her new friends that she had just been visiting. This new friend lives on a tight budget and really needed a car. She is very spiritual and hoowy woowy like us. She chose an Abraham with Esther Hicks teaching or The Secret…that wasn’t clear, but she chose this recorded teaching and listened to it every day for two months. She also refused to see anything ugly. She immersed herself in what felt good, made her happy, looked attractive. If she saw an ugly car she would just turn and look for a lovely car and admire it. This cost no money. At the end of the two months, she manifested a new car! True story. I don’t know any more details than this. But it inspired me.
So, my friend left today and I immediately got online to find some Abraham teachings that might speak to me. Of course, I did find it. The message is this in a nutshell:
- Follow what feels good. It is not lazy or irresponsible. You are listening to your inner guide. What feels good is what is really right for you and all you want to co-create with the Universe.
- If something doesn’t feel good, turn around and leave and never go back. It is your inner guide letting you know that it is NOT where you are supposed to be.
- This goes for everything from books you read, people you hang out with, places you go to hang out, drink coffee, or shop.
- Follow your bliss and you will find your destiny.
- Follow the path of least resistance.
We are raised to work hard and sweat and tears will pay off. Maybe in the old days, this was the truth. It is no longer. When you are doing what you enjoy, it is not work. When you are spending time with people you enjoy and that are uplifting, you don’t suffer from gossip or being judged. When you listen to that inner guide you are listening to a warning system. This inner guide has been with you for many lifetimes and knows you and your truest desires and intentions even better than you sometimes. It’s not just a party ship trying to keep the fun rolling. Through your emotions, you will learn about who you really are and you will be led to where you really are supposed to be.
I feel like so many people, this planet, and whole communities would prosper if everyone was doing what they truly wanted to be doing rather than what they were “supposed” to do according to a parent, teacher, leader, society. What if we all started following our bliss? What if we all let go of all our bullshit ideas of life and work and started to find enjoyment in what we did? What if we all let go of all that “stuff”, both emotional and physical and just lived simply and focused on a good life?
I know that I’m only one of billions thinking this. Why don’t we all just try it?
For example; I am refusing to shop at the box stores anymore. They are big, bright, unnatural, and sometimes the crowds that frequent these discount food stores freak me out. I may be a snooty snot, but I just can’t take it at times. I need a higher vibration crowd. I am the happiest in the Health Food C0-0p, though funds are tight on groceries, I feel like that is where I need to shop and I’ll make it work. We will wind up eating healthier than ever because you really can’t buy extras there. Organic snacks cost an arm and leg.
I will also only hang out in certain parts of town and the city. I will only take my kids to certain parks where it feels safe and good. We don’t live anywhere unsafe, it’s just that some parts don’t feel that good. Why not respect that? Some people would like to befriend me, I’m not interested. I would like some friends here, but some of them don’t feel right. Why question it? Just move on and chalk it up to your inner guide sparing you drama in the future.
I’m going to follow this formula. Do what feels good, fill up on the positive, listen to more of my good spiritual messages, keep creating with faith, focus on the beauty in life and the world instead of everything that isn’t working (according to me).
Life here I come!!!