Sammy and Kate Cook. Name change for YouTube Channel.

 

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Coffee with Kate will be no more. Awww…what happened? Where did it go? Why are you quitting just when it was getting good?

I ain’t quittin’ peoples! I just had an enlightened moment with my sons the other night and then a strange cooking dream followed…and then the smoke alarm went off because Bali was burning toast at four in the morning…so a new show was born, voila!

The Coffee with Kate channel has been renamed Sammy and Kate Cook.

So many things are happening for me emotionally and I’ve been shifting into a new paradigm.

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I think about my neighbors too much. I think about money too often. I think about frugality and saving pennies all the time. I think about chores and what needs cleaning next. I think about how we don’t have enough funds to move now or travel or many other things. I think about how I can’t seem to motivate to write fiction. NaNoWriMo is in full effect and I’ve started a book over twice and I just can’t stand them.

I’m stuck in a very boring rut. I’m burnt out on cleaning and I’m wanting to move into a 28 ft trailer that takes five minutes to clean and travel endlessly so I can run from relationships and neighbors and the grind of daily life.

My eldest said that he’s sick of my homemaking. Sam, the youngest is needy as all get out. I love the channel, it is my creative outlet but it feels like it competes for attention with my children. It also is wearing thin on how many ways I can talk about frugality and saving.

I was introduced to a few blogs, documentaries, and channels lately. They all had an impact. Haegreendal on Youtube had me thinking that you could have a very Zen like homemaking style. Street Food documentaries on Netflix brought to light that when our patterns get stale we don’t need to change paths, just find new and creative ways to do our thing and to focus on quality and experiment to bring our craft to its full potential. Find your path and then keep enriching it. Cook Your Life on Vudu (documentary) along with Walk With Me on Netflix (also documentary) caused a craving to slow down and become present in each and every moment. The other not mentioned blogs and channels brought to light that there are hundreds and thousands of homemaking and budgeting channels and blogs and it’s a tired subject…at least for me.

I’ve been praying for inner bliss and peace and asking for guidance toward this good place. In the meantime, the Universe has been answering my request without me really being aware of it. It started with the massive declutters, organizing, purging, and scrubbing of my house that went on for months and just never seemed to be enough. Then came all the documentaries that slowly woke me from my homemaking slumber. Then I practiced some working meditations. I heard you don’t have to sit on a pretty pillow with a candle flickering before oneself to meditate. You can go about your daily duties and meditate as you sweep floors and suds the morning dishes.

I became severely agitated about life. I was bothered with neighbors…neighbors on my street and not on my street. I became impatient with my children, I woke in the middle of the night to think angry thoughts about the past, family, guilt. I felt old.

I was sure I was starting menopause although I have no other symptoms. And I may be entering into this new season, yes, but I have suddenly realized that it is so much more.

I’m frustrated with myself. I am still having toxic thoughts, I still waste time bothering with other peoples lives. I am driving myself constantly and serving others. Why? It is simply this; my brain has been trained to suffer and I was raised to serve and to deem myself worth only when I was serving. When I was not serving my parent or others I was told I was worthless. So I drive myself to feel worthy. I worry because that is my brain’s default pattern. I was also taught to worry about money and the world at large.

I have since looked at this, embraced it and sent it packing. I have made the commitment to find out who I really am without serving and being enslaved by my old brainwashing. I will honor and nurture myself and find out what it is I would truly like to do, be, have, write, read, and eat even.

I know that I would like to move from this town and I know just the town I dream of nesting in. I’m making it happen right now. No more disabling thoughts such as “we can’t move there, it’s too much money!” or “it would be easier to just stay here and learn to love it.” No more limiting thoughts, just do it! Jump and the net will appear. When the Universe says go, you go without weighing yourself down with logic. Go by the gut, it’s right every time.

The next thing I came to realize last night, actually, and with the help of both my son’s wise insight, that I’m tired of the frugal gig. My sons are seven and five and they told me to basically expand my horizons, try new and creative things. Arjan and Sam suggested more cooking, but having more fun with it, and Sam suggested that I focus on spiritual work. He said, “show people how kindness can help manifest your dreams.” What? He’s five! They are my guides in this life.

I had a dream we were rolling bananas in Panko and baking when the smoke alarm woke me this morning. When I woke, it was not just physically. I woke up to a new sense of being, of what I wanted to create and I wanted to do it with my sons not aside from my family. I have faith and happiness in my heart today. I’m starting anew with life today.

I’ve been encouraged, guided, loved and supported by the community on that channel and I am looking forward to bringing a lot of fun and creativity to it. I will not talk so much about frugality, I’ll just show it. I’ll not talk of living on so little, I’ll talk instead of building wealth in many ways such as joy, health, family and friends. I will cook up a storm with my sons and they will help me create new dishes. We will talk about spiritual work, healing, meditation. Then there is gardening, canning, having a writing career, and homeschooling. I’m even going to analyze movies and documentaries as I love, love movies and documentaries!

See you there!

And here is the first video on the new and revised Channel.

 

 

 

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13 thoughts on “Sammy and Kate Cook. Name change for YouTube Channel.

  1. Thank you for sharing your journey with us. Recently when I saw your channel I thought that you needed a break from what you’re doing, that maybe it wasn’t inspiring you or giving you energy anymore. Change is scary but oh so good. Open the doors and let the wind blow everything out. I hope the next few weeks bring new beginnings.

    The way you were trained to think reflects mine, it was weird to read that. I don’t feel worthy or needed unless I’m serving. I was actually thinking about having hypnotherapy to rewrite the message routed deep in my conscious. We are enough! Even when we serve our kids chicken nuggets and sit on the sofa with them watching tv!

    You’re amazing and you’ve helped so many of us on our journeys. I hope these new beginnings bring you peace.

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  2. You will find more peace in your life as you continue to listen to your own ‘gut feelings’
    We all do. Going through menopause and entering into my 50’s has made me ask questions as well. As you continue to ask the questions and listen to the answers you receive — the more calm will happen.
    Loved your post. Inspiring and thoughtful.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m actually so excited for the change! I watch every episode you put out and now my kids will watch more with me😁
    I’m at a crossroads myself, struggling with patience as a parent and being grateful for the little things (and the big ones). I want that clean house but want to have fun with the kids. Sometimes you just can’t have it all! Like you said in previous posts, minimizing your house and life helps! It’s ingrained in my psyche to make things complicated and I’m always trying to take on too much. I’m trying to be conscious about making life simple and gentle. All the excess is, well, excessive!
    Your new spin on your channel will inspire us to slow down and enjoy life. Maybe you and the boys can tie in the frugal aspect with more cooking shows that highlight only a few ingredients? Like a frugal Iron Chef😂🤣

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    1. Hi! I went back to the old name and stuff. Too many were really wanting it to not change…however, I will be doing things differently. I’m on vacation now and when I come back I’ll work on making it new in many ways.

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  4. Take a vacation from YouTube, or make it a weekly thing, not a daily endeavor. Go be you. Be human, don’t beat yourself up for being human. Philia.

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  5. I ‘vs often wondered how people keep going on YouTube….Like do they lose interest and need a change. You take a good long break and see where life leads you, Kate. Knowing you these last few months has been an honor. You are awesome….no matter what.

    I am a devout Catholic and have found both Benedictine and Ignatian spirituality to be great help in dealing with the past, change, and purpose. These are helpful to people of any faith or no faith at all.

    Just wanted to toss those out there.

    Love to you!!!

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  6. Glad you are taking a rest. You have been doing a lot lately. Raising two boys around 50 years of age is really hard. I know. We adopted a 1 year old and 2 year old the year I turned 50. There were so many days I thought I couldn’t find enough energy and patience. I was basically a single parent most of the time because my husband was gone 12 hours a day during the week. You have been operating very much like a single parent as well with Bali working the extra hours PLUS you have been homeschooling the boys, and, let’s face it, summertimes are really busy with little ones! You need to give yourself a break.

    You have such a great personality, I hope you will be able to return fully rested. I am hopeful you will continue your same types of talks and also let us watch you cook. You don’t need to preach the frugal ways ALL THE TIME.

    You are most definitely suffering from frugal fatigue, a term I learned when I was experiencing it as well. The joy of saving was gone – I was just tired of thinking about saving money and living on little. I just wanted some fun.

    You are a creative person and you need a creative outlet in the midst of all your business. When you are creative, a creative outlet is not a luxury, it’s a need. You need to find a way to feed your need to discover and create.

    Just one more thing, and I don’t even know if you are going to read your emails, but here goes. I sense your honesty in your spiritual learnings and searchings. I totally relate. Just a thought: Because your Mom couldn’t be the kind of Mom you needed, you are suffering from that deficit. Raising children helps as you feel nurtured when you’re nurturing, but there is a limit to how much you can do that.

    If you are able, instead of always trying to find information on how to do better, just let it go and give it to God. Ask Him to feel that need in you that may be unexpressable but ever present. Let God heal your spirit and give you that unconditional acceptance you desire. This may take a lot of effort to release it – I know – but it will get easier.

    Not trying to preach. Just trying to share some of my journey and insights.

    You take care. You are loved.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. This is wonderful Ruth and I agree, sometimes…or maybe most of the time we need to just let it go and be quiet, that is the quickest way to peace and happiness. I am impressed that you took on two babies at 50!! I’m almost 49 and the boys are older but I get frustrated. I’m enjoying this break immensely and I will be happy to return soon. I’ll have all sorts of things to share and we will do the same but in more interesting ways. 🙂

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