I’ve been taking some time to enjoy other YouTube Channels and learn a few tricks, collect a basket full of ideas, and be refueled with fresh inspiration myself these days.
I wrote some blogs recently that I took down for various reasons. I was going to change my channel (that was not the best idea as my subscribers love Coffee with Kate, can’t rebrand after so many years) and then I changed it back. This seemed to be a reflection of some inner storm brewing.
I love change, crave change. Change and new things feed my spirit and make me feel alive. Yes, a rolling stone gathers no moss…ah, but it has so many travels and stories! So, I wanted to try new things and it turns out my channel wasn’t the place to do that.
So what did I do? I decided it was time to move. I wanted to move to a town and forest area that I have loved for years. I woke up one day and felt like it was time. I’ve felt this before and that is what led us here to this sweet cottage in town. I’m not sure if I was really getting a message from my guides or the itch to move on was my motivation.
We found an old but cozy mobile home on 2 acres of land and we made an offer. It was accepted and I was thrilled. The boys were happy, Bali was getting on board a little slower than us but still climbing on the moving train. We signed papers and put our house on the market, I filled the truck with packing boxes and watched videos on staging the house, remodeling an old mobile, homesteading on an acre or more, and anything that had to do with either mobiles or land.
I was so relieved and enthusiastic. I dreamt and planned and announced to everyone that we were moving! Yay!
Then a dark witch swooped in and offered a bundle of cash that I couldn’t compete with. Turned out the sellers hadn’t signed yet so they could still take offers. After 8 months of this mobile sitting there with no one interested and all the sudden, they get a full offer? It was fishy. But more upsetting and what really made me hot faced and teary-eyed with anger was that in this day and age a spoken agreement means nothing. Words mean nothing but are used to distract, sell, and confuse. Money and greed win most of the time.
I moved on but not before I wrote the realtor and let him know that this time he was going to hear about the human aspect of these deals. Usually, they sell the house, make the deals, collect the commission and off they go without care. They don’t know the heartache, the letdown…nor do they care. But here my family sits with a house on the market and no future plans or house. We kept our word and acted in good faith.
He did write back some long excuse but I deleted it. Business without heart and integrity is cold and soulless. I also learned a big business lesson; never have the same realtor that works for the seller work for you, because they won’t, they are always for the seller. Note to self!
Now we are dating another house. It’s more expensive but offers us so much more. My husband is really into this property and was proactive about walking the land and asking questions. When I pointed out issues he shrugged and said they were nothing. This was a better response than his disinterest in the first property.
The other difference is that my dear and trusted realtor is taking charge of this one. I am limp and wilty for now, with my trust bucket empty. I know now that it is all about the game and money and convenience. I refuse to paint the walls or plan my fall garden here as of yet. I detest business and money…or the lack of it when it’s needed.
I find out today or tomorrow if the sellers agree to our offer.
If they do I just may perk up a bit and set to work again. If they don’t I will need time to adjust because Bali and I decided that if this doesn’t work out we will stop for now and just focus on saving money.
For someone like me, it means turning around on a path I was excited about exploring and going back home. It means getting back into the spirit of acceptance and appreciation of where we are and what we have.
We live in a charming home, safe neighborhood despite some issues. We have plenty of money despite not having much…but it’s a lot for us. We have health and friends and family. We have so many good things we can do around here.
I think about the women on my channel that are dealing with huge issues; sick elders and parents they are tending to, children with special needs. Some of these families want to move on as well but are tethered to their duties. This is a hard place to be and makes one resentful. We don’t want to be resentful, we want to be loving and compassionate in our duties…but it is a drain spiritually, physically, mentally. I’ve taken care of a grandmother and mother.
It’s hard but when we do a good job of it and put our attention on helping the person in need of our nurturing, we are rewarded greatly. We feel like better people inwardly. It builds strength and grace and knowing that we are capable of anything. After the parent or elder passes, we are rewarded with freedom and good karma.
I took care of my grandmother somewhat when I was 15 years old. I was too young and too burdened. I did the best I could. I was kind and tended to her but I would sit in her room and watch soaps while she slept. She wasn’t able to talk to me about life. We didn’t get to connect really.
In my late thirties, I tended to my mother and I was alone during this time. I did a great job because I had been taking spiritual classes and had been working on my healing for over a year so I was in a good place. I had the strength to take care of her and help her transition. When she passed I was a new person. My life took off after that. There was enormous healing that took place from being there for her. It was a gift. Some of you that watch my channel know that my mother was abusive and my childhood had been a hard one. But this ending was a true gift of finally seeing the truth of all things without one word being exchanged.
So, what’s my point this morning?
Accepting, embracing, surrendering to where we are is what heals us and eventually, we can and will move on to greener pastures.